Communication Archives - New England Hold Me Tight

1,000 Soft Touches–ACTIVITY

White feather against blue sky background. This signifies the light touch of emotional connection learned from eft marriage intensives in Massachusetts or emotionally focused intensive couples therapy in Massachusetts.

“1,000 Soft Touches” involves doing the ‘little things’ for your partner so he/she feels SEEN and HEARD.

As much as people understand the idea, it’s often difficult for people to imagine what would be a ‘soft touch’.

Slow Down Conflicts With ‘Infinity Listening’–VIDEO

Sign of infinity using blue and yellow/orange 'lights'. This signifies active listening pattern learned at New England Hold Me Tight at an eft marriage intensive in Massachusetts.

I don’t feel heard in this relationship.” is a frequent complaint that I get when working with couples. Another is, “I don’t want to say anything as it will just make a big argument.”

Can you relate to either of these phrases? If so, it’s understandable you feel apprehensive of having conversations with your partner.

Two Good Things Plus One Gift–RELATIONSHIP ACTIVITY

Two hands making heart shape around a daisy in grass. This signifies emotional connection for couples and improved communication for couples after attending a private marriage retreat in New Engalnd.

This exercise is about noticing and acknowledging good things daily to improve your mood. It also focuses on sharing good things we like about our partner to make a positive connection.

10 Coping Strategies Used by Resilient Couples & Families During COVID

Apparently lesbian couple jumping in silhouette. This signifies feeling good after getting relationship help with a lesbian expert or a lesbian relationship coach and attending a lesbian-friendly hold me tight workshop.

Everyone is feeling the impact of the social isolation and logistical complications of self-quarantining. During my online sessions with individuals and couples, I am seeing some coping more successfully than others. Here is a list of the strategies I am seeing the more resilient couples and families use.

“What I Feel, What I Want, and What I Need”–COMMUNICATION ACTIVITY

Stack of three stones on sand background. Signifies emotional balance after receiving relationship help for lesbian couples in the form of emotionally focused couples therapy intensive in Massachusetts..

Couples have conflicts more frequently during times of transition, such as when getting up in the morning, greeting one another at the end of the day, or getting things ready as kids do evening tasks.

This activity expresses each partner’s priorities quickly and clearly so both partners can work together, prioritizing needs and recognizing the feelings and wants of each other.

How Using “YOU” Can Make a Mess of “Us”–BLOG

Silhouette of angry couple arguing. This image is meant to portray the benefit of attending a couples therapy retreat in Massachusetts or an EFT marriage intensive in Massachusetts.

“You are doing it again.”
“You are not listening to me.”
Sometimes, you are attempting to express and connect with your partner and stumble into a conflict innocently by the use of ‘you’.

3 Goals for a Healthy Relationship–BLOG

Silhouette of couople with arms raised in success. This image is meant to symbolize the relief from knowing how to grow together, resolve conflicts, and have mutual respect after attending a Hold Me Tightworkshop for Couples or a Private Couple and Marriage Retreat

It is a new year and you may have made some New Year’s resolutions. Yay you! One of the first steps towards making a change in your life is envisioning what you want and then setting some goals towards it.

In case you are envisioning an improved relationship this year, I am hoping to give a little guidance.

Helping Your Partner With ‘Complicated Family’–VIDEO/BLOG

Light house with large ocean wave washing over it. Image represents how having a communication strategy helps couple resolve conflicts and practice how to apologize effectively. My New England Hold Me Tight workshops do this!

“Complicated family”

You have your own strategies for managing your more ‘difficult’ relations.

Seeing your partner struggle, though, through painful family drama can trigger a myriad of emotions in you: helplessness, frustration, isolation, and disconnect; to name a few.

You want to help your partner (which indirectly, will also help you), but are not sure how. This video/blog gives some concrete suggestions.

How to Show Appreciation in Your Relationship So That You Both Benefit–VIDEO/BLOG

Thank You written on pink background. This image is meant to portray getting help to make relationship better in Massachusetts.

“I just don’t feel appreciated by my partner…I don’t feel that he acknowledges what I am doing and he just doesn’t seem to appreciate me.”

Learn some benefits of showing appreciation in your relationship and ways to make your efforts a bit more effective.

How to ‘Be There’ for Your Partner–BLOG

Couple seated with woman crying; husband is consoling her. This image is meant to portray better communication that happens with couples attending marriage counseling retreats in New England.

Your partner comes to you stressed out. You want to help her; make things better. So, you start making suggestions on what she should do.

She replies, “I don’t need you to fix it, I just need you to listen!”

You feel at a loss as to what to do; you thought you were being helpful. Confused and hurt, you become quiet.

She continues, “Here we go. I try to talk with you about things and you just shut down or don’t respond. You can’t just be there for me.”